Comparing and being content

I am a student who is studying UX Program online. One of the toughest thing about studying by myself is to be motivated, to keep finding value inside of me and believing in who I am, where I am, and where I am going.

I can be a jealous person. People say using too much SNS can be harmful for your identity because you are exposed to this world where you see people who are extremely talented. Especially for those who are NATURALLY Talented and work hard.

Well, today I took a risk of exploring others work online while I was stuck with building my portfolio as I am getting ready to be in the field.

My initial thought was “I should explore different ideas to get motivated!”

30 minutes later…

An hour later…

“They are younger than I am. They have better degrees. Their design is unique. They work for big companies. They.. they.. I am…”

A drop of tear and another…

At that moment, I saw myself, squatting down and weeping in the corner of my deep heart. A girl who tries, but thinks she is not enough.

Who made her cry?

SNS? Talented people who spark joy in the world? No, it was myself, Haley. All of a sudden, “They, they…” came back to me like a fast Boomerang as

“Who am I? Where am I? Where am I going?”

“I am Haley. I am a student who studies UX Design. I am working hard, and those effort will shine on my way. I am enough, and everyone is different. People out there are sparkling joy with their talents, and I am living in that beautiful world. Let’s go out and make more sparkles with them together.”

There’s a saying,

“The one who was born a genius can’t win against the one who tries, and the one who tries can’t win against the one who enjoys.” — Confucius

I am not naturally talented, but as long as I persistently try and enjoy, it will shine. It may take longer than I think, but let’s not give up, but keep going.